Intro to Lovingkindness for the Self

Guided Meditation: Lovingkindness for the Self

Metta in Poems and Laughter: This post includes a short and charming  video that introduces the basic practice of metta or loving kindness and also includes the poem “Love Does That” by Meister Eckhart which was part of this week’s guided  meditation.

I quoted the biblical scholar Ralph Davis on the meaning of the hebrew word heed, which is found in the Bible some thirty times and translated as Lovingkindness in the King James version: “hesed often has that flavor: it is not merely love, but loyal love; not merely kindness, but dependable kindness; not merely affection, but affection that has committed itself.” Ralph Davis, Focus on the Bible Commentaries

Sharon Salzberg is a beloved teacher of lovingkindness and her books, including Loving Kindness and Real Love, as well as her podcasts, and workshops, have helped the practice of lovingkindness become widely known and embraced. You can learn more about Sharon on her website. Here is an excerpt from her book Real Love in which she talks about her first experience with practicing lovingkindness:

When we opened the Insight Meditation Society in February 1976, we didn’t have any programming scheduled for the first month. Those of us who were there decided to do a retreat ourselves. I decided to do intensive lovingkindness practice, which I had long wanted to do. Even though I didn’t have a teacher to guide me, I relied on my knowledge of the structure of the practice (beginning with offering lovingkindness to yourself, etc.) and began. I spent the whole first week offering lovingkindness to myself, and I just felt nothing. No bolts of lightning, no great breakthrough moment—it felt pretty dreary.

Then something happened to a friend of ours in Boston, so several of us suddenly had to leave the retreat. I was upstairs in one of the bathrooms, getting ready to go, when I dropped a large jar of something on the tile floor, and the jar shattered. To my amazement, I noticed the first thought that came to me was You are really a klutz, but I love you. Look at that! I thought. You could have given me anything in the course of that week to persuade me something was happening, and I would have said no. Yet all along, something deep and profound was shifting.

The traditional phrases of lovingkindness can feel wooden, most especially at first. Feel free to adapt them, to find those phrases that really speak to you. Here are a few suggestions:

From Jon Kabat-Zinn

• May I be happy
• May I be healthy
• May I ride the waves of my life
• May I live in peace
  No matter what I am given

From Jack Kornfield:

• May you be filled with lovingkindness.
• May you be well.
• May you be at ease.
• May you be safe.
• May you be peaceful.

I have a few simple statements focused on l love that I return to time and again:

• May I be loved
• May I be loving
• May I be open to receive love
• May I be able to feel loved
• May I be full of love